If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company
-Jean-Paul Sartre
Are you afraid of being lonely? I think most people are. It is natural, of course, to want to have a companion. to want to be around others, and to want to be accepted by others. I'm not an extrovert by any means, nor am I really an introvert, but I find that I do like to be alone, to be lonely. My solitude allows me to do a lot of thinking about life and the person I wish to become. My solitude allows me to learn and read about philosophy and religion. Also, my solitude allows me to express myself through mediums such as Vox. Being alone really isn't a horrible thing. Don't get me wrong, I would really like to find a companion, but I just don't have the urge to really find one right now. I'm still trying to figure out myself.
I'm currently learning about Nietzsche by watching a series of DVD's by Robert Solomon and Kathleen Higgins, and I find it interesting how Nietzsche found one's fear of solitude to be a major problem. Nietzsche thinks that solitude is a very important aspect of human existence, according to Solomon. Further, Solomon states that "to be shunned is just that kind of motivation we need to be able to tell the truth." To be lonely is to question all that the masses do not wish to question. Because we fear being lonely, we fail to question the thoughts and beliefs of the masses. We stop our search for truth because of our fear of being shunned. Nietzsche saw the effects of the fear of loneliness as problematic.
With regards to the fear of being lonely, Nietzsche was most concerned about morality and Christianity. What really drives us to be moral is the fear that we will lose our friends and that people won't talk to us if we do not act morally. Nietzsche, as well as Solomon, claim that if you really analyze your reasons for being moral, you will find that your fear of being lonely is your dominant motivation for being moral. This type of morality, is the type Nietzsche termed herd morality: we are moral because we wish to be accepted; we do not question the morals that we have been given. I haven't gotten to the lecture on Nietzsche's views on morality in detail yet, but I found Nietzsche's view on this type of morality to be quite interesting. (There are two types of morality identified by Nietzsche: master morality and slave morality. I'll be sure to blog about them later).
For Nietzsche, and for Kierkegaard as well, Christianity had becoming nothing but a herd religion. To Nietzsche, Church was just a social institution, an exclusive club of sorts. The "real" reason you go to Church is because you get to be around other people and communicate with them. You accept their herd mentality and follow the herd's path towards truth. Once you are in this social club, you do not wish to leave it because you are fearful of being shunned; thus, you fail to question the herd's mentality and its version of truth. You just follow. I found this to be a very accurate observation. I remember going to church because my friends went....and for the donuts. I didn't really go to church because I actually believed in what I was being taught. Rather, I knew it was taboo to not go to church, and my father had always taught me that good Christians go to church, so I went. I wonder how many people go to church because of their fear of being shunned?
Comments
The angst of the existentialist, I think, makes us all lonely by definition. Knowing how responsible we are for .... for everything, means we are ultimately alone no matter what. Belonging to a church is probably about as opposite as one can get.
I moved up here with a small child -- three freeway hours from friends and family. I was painfully lonely. I, a devout atheist for 20 years, thought seriously about joining a church. Actually tried. I couldn't do it, but I want/needed the support of a herd so much that I tried.
Hard to fathom now that I'm all secure, befriended and confident.
I once thought about doing that: joining a church to be around people. Church really is a good outlet to make friends and meet new people, but it's rather hard to go to church when you think the teachers are just spewing out false and fatuous truth. I've been trying to find a secular group to hang out with, but I've had no luck.
Existentialism is at the front of my mind, so is Nietzsche; he is my favorite philosopher.
Quite frankly I'd rather be alone and lonely than to join a church. :P
Good friends are definitely hard to find. The church thing didn't really work out for me. Like you, I found out that I'd rather be lonely than join a church. I'm pretty sure I couldn't stand to listen to a single sermon anyways.
My brother and my friends still invite me to a church event called "Merge." It's basically an event that takes place every week for young singles and college students. It's sort of like a big bible study, I think. Anyways, when they invite me I always ask, "You know I am an atheist, so why would I go to that?" "Oh, dude, just come and hang out, you'll have fun." It would be cool to meet some new people, but I'm not there for the same purpose as they are. Why would I go to church just to hang out with people? That doesn't make a lot of sense to me.
besides, i like quiet as well as noise
on another vein - we've chosen not to have children, and every once in a while, i wonder if that means that maybe steven will die before me and i'll die alone - however, even that level of morbidity would not make me go back to the church or turn back to a god...
I've heard of the same kind of event where I live.. the description and sound of it makes me laugh.
I think I could date a Christian, but this person couldn't be the traditional type of Christian.